Are you Chasing a Dream...?

Honour Life, While You're Living It

Life is so fragile, so short. Age is a meaningless number.

I very recently, lost a friend of mine who I'd known since I was in high-school in Hong Kong. He was a few years younger than me, an almost inconceivable notion to accept that he is no longer among us. A few weeks ago, another good friend of mine passed away. She was much older, but like I said, age does not matter. Life is life.

We are so focused on the here and the now, and we weep with the loss of those who go before us. And while their presence is no longer here in persona, their energy and "life" continues on. Their adventure has only just started, and what an adventure that is.

For those of us "left behind" on this spinning rock, we must make the most out of every minute, and create our adventure each and every moment of each day.

We need to focus on living and not focus on the negatives that hit us and hold us down/back.

Does it really matter that someone you love said something that offended you? Would it be so important if they were to go in the next few minutes?

Each time I am faced with the loss of someone I love dearly, it just fortifies me to love stronger, deeper, forgive more readily, accept unconditionally, and always make sure I let those I love know their worth to me, my appreciation of them, and how much I love them.

In the end, when we sit back and look at all the "little things" that have "piled up", they truly are only our Selves building mountains out of grains of sand. These "mountains" will dissipate with the storm of loss. So why hold on to those mountains, continue adding to them, at times burying ourselves under them? Just let go.

Release the negativity, the anger, the annoyance... It doesn't really matter. It's almost never "that" huge, and living a life where you can truly LIVE and let go and let God, will reduce much stress in your own life, and may possibly prolong your life.

Rest in peace my dear friends and loved ones who have departed. Your lessons have been etched upon my soul, and I pledge to remember them.

I am filled with gratitude and love for all of you who are in my life, even if you only read my updates, "Like" something, or make a comment here and there, you each mean so much to me, and I want to extend my gratitude and love for you all.


Namaste

_/|\_

Grace and Gratitude

Remember the strength in gratitude and appreciation. From the smallest thing in your life, to the biggest; give thanks and gratitude. The moment we start to FEEL that appreciation and gratitude is the moment we actually SEE how wealthy we truly are.

_/|\_

Namaste 

Tolerance v. Acceptance

There has been something that has irked me for a while, that is the use of the terminology "tolerate".

Too often, I have heard good-hearted and kind people, use that terminology when referring to others. I remember one Sunday class at church when a very sweet lady gave a lesson in the ladies "Relief Society" meeting and said "I was brought up to tolerate all people and love them just the same."

That truly got my juices flowing because I understood where she was coming from, and I understood what she meant, what she really meant even if she did not.

"Tolerance" is nothing more than an acceptable way of "putting up with something". When we "put up" with something, we do not necessarily like it, we certainly do not embrace it; but it is there, there is really nothing we can do to change it or create something different... "better" (in our own understanding), so we'll just "put up" with it and because we are doing that, its OK.

For instance, I remember meeting a family who were very religious. They presented themselves as very nice and kind people, but in truth, were very prejudiced and the very sad thing about it was, they had no idea how prejudice they were, or what harm they were inflicting upon others in their usage of the word "tolerance".

Without regard, they would speak about people who were gay and say "we are really good Christians, and we are taught to tolerate all people and love them, and even those who are gay, we tolerate and love as Christ would."

Hold-up the covered wagons here a moment, "as Christ would"? First off, Christ accepted and loved without having to "put up with". There was a purity in His love and His ministry. Too many self-confessed "Christians" out there need to get back to basics and learn the plain facts about their Lord and Saviour and apply it to their lives.

I find there are more people outside of mainstream Christendom, or religion as a whole, who maybe go against the current of societies "norm" (depending on what society one belongs to), who have more Christ-like qualities and love, than some Christians have in their little finger.

Tolerance is NOT a word I use unless I truly AM tolerating something. Like the toothache I currently have but have been to damn lazy to go to the dentist... Yep I am definitely tolerating it. Or the fact that I live in Arizona and the summer is fast approaching and I can do nothing but tolerate it to get through it.

Tolerate is a word that should never be used in reference to an individual or group of individuals.

We are all different. We all have our paths to walk. We are all on a journey. No one knows the true nature of another's journey (or struggles along that journey), and to simply reduce and dismiss any true embracing and unconditional love with "tolerance", is ignorance to its core.

Acceptance is pure. It is all-embracing and all-inclusive. It does not judge. It simply is. The individual, the situation, simply Is.

I would rather that people are honest with themselves than fool themselves into believing that they are acting in a kind, compassionate, and loving manner when they are "tolerating" another. The one who is "tolerated" knows exactly what is going on; whether cognitive or not, their souls know and this sets them on a path.

Too many people in this world have hang-ups about being themselves and embracing themselves fully, because of others simple tolerance of them.

When I hear that word, I feel dirty. I feel abused. I feel... sad.

And for the "offender" who has used this terminology without complete comprehension, there is nothing to feel guilt over. Simply find honesty within you and make a change. Do you truly only "tolerate" a person, situation, or group, or do you truly accept and embrace them?

It can be a hard thing to deduce and then be honest and completely raw about.

For the one who is religious and trying to emulate the goodness that their religion teaches, it is hard to accept the fact that they truly believe that something, or someone, is an abomination to ones psyche and presence. And years of "tolerance" has made one immune to the stench of that "putrid nature". It is complete and total brainwashing by religious dogma which justifies and serves no one but the ones who first spewed it out. In other words, it's bullshit. No one can truly be judged in such a manner. But that is what man-made religion has condensed and stuffed individuals into such categories... "untouchables" in some societies.

To finally free oneself from the deception of lies that makes one tolerate someone or situation, is liberating. Ones true nature can only set you free.

I do not say to turn against or become nasty to those once tolerated, but rather remove Self from their presence. Be honest in saying to yourself, "I don't like it. I don't agree. I don't wish to be around...".

In our world, there are so many variances and we can't all agree or embrace or love each variance. We have to be true to ourselves.

My main issue is not simply the word and action, it is the falseness behind it. It is the lies and deception.

If one truly accepts in the purest form of the meaning, then one should look at changing their vocabulary to reflect such. Remove "tolerate" from your speech pattern, replace it with "accept".

When I envision the word accept, I feel a warm hug embracing me, loving me, allowing me to truly be me without any "buts" or conditions. I can simply BE without having to worry about anything or anyone around me. I feel no judgment. I feel no need to correct or make changes to anyone. I feel no scrutiny. I feel, free.

Our society has created itself to be where very few can truly live in complete and total acceptance, and very few can truly offer that purist form of acceptance that is Divine acceptance.

Many of us accept and embrace a certain criteria, but still "tolerate" another.

Maybe, it is time that we all look at our Selves. Be keenly aware for one entire day (or go a full-week identifying) how we act or react to certain events or individuals. Note it down if you must and make it a tangible record for you to see, behold, and touch.

As you are out and about, how do you view the vagrant on the street? Do you embrace and accept them, or do you merely tolerate them?

How about the other drivers on the road? Do you fall into the trap of road-rage? What words and emotions do you emit to the other driver?

What about those you work with?

Or the common person on the street, at the supermarket, in the mall; what thoughts are flowing through your mind, conversations with your Self?

And your loved ones? How do you truly feel about them? Do you accept them unconditionally, or could you point out changes that you feel they should make?

If you need to, write down your thoughts, your actions, your words, your feelings, your emotions, etc.

It is a great experiment in seeing how much of our day we are either "tolerating" others, or not even tolerating but rather being outright angry and intolerant, not accepting, correcting, trying to change others.

Be aware also of the feelings you have of complete and total acceptance. Note the difference in the feeling, the emotion, the way you act or speak.

For some, understanding the difference between tolerance and acceptance is difficult. Here is a hint to help you out and help you identify those times when you are being tolerant or accepting.

When you speak to a person or speak about a subject; do you feel yourself holding back in any way - as if there is a barrier between you? Are you weighing your words carefully? Are creating a persona within yourself that you know is created and not true? If you are or do, then that situation is one where you are being tolerant.

When you speak to a person or speak about a subject, are you vivacious and animated? Are you having fun? Are you truly yourself with no "filter" over your mind or mouth and you simply are in a state of being? You have no trouble expressing yourself and you feel love and joy flowing through you as you speak or act. Do you completely and totally feel for the person you are speaking to, or situation you are speaking about, without anything but joy? Without any need to correct, or change, or add in a "but"? This is the pure form of acceptance.

When we accept another or a situation, we have nothing to fear in the way we act or speak. We simply are because we are present. We embrace. We love. We don't hold back because we know that nothing we say or do is done with malice or ill-intent so even speaking directly about the situation or person, is comfortable because we are comfortable.

When we are in a state of tolerance, we can not ever truly let ourselves go in the moment. We are cautious about our words and our thoughts in fear (or concern) we might say, or do, the wrong thing. We are constantly watchful and mindful of every little thing we do, say, or think. We are on the lookout for any opportunity to add where they can make changes or corrections. We look out for areas where we can "help" in changing them, improving them (or the situation). We can not truly be satisfied and constantly have to look to improve. What it boils down to is that we can never truly be free in the situation or around the individuals.

In essence, we are holding ourselves prisoner and we have sentenced ourselves to life without parole.

It truly is not anyone's fault that one is caught up in this sort of belief pattern. It is society and upbringing and environment that forms a person. No one is to blame. There truly is no fault. To find blame or fault is to perpetuate a cycle that needs to end.

Our world truly is not tolerant, and it is not accepting. But we can change that. If each person reading this were to experiment for one day, or one week, in learning what they are accepting of and what they are tolerant of, it would be a start.

Once one knows and understands, and is honest about the differences, focus on what it is about the aspects on the "tolerance" side that offend you.

Maybe you have a cousin or a friend or a neighbour who is gay. What is it about them being gay offends you? Is it them being gay or the idea of anyone being gay? Understand your feelings. Identify your truth. Could it possibly be that there is fear and ignorance of those who are gay? How do you identify someone who is gay? Is it only about the sex or that you feel they could never possibly love to the same degree as a heterosexual person? Do you look at them as being gay or choosing to be gay? Is it a religious aspect? Have you ever spoken with someone who is openly gay and asked them what it is like for them? How was it coming out? Did they have fears? What fears did they have? Or simply ask them why they are gay? The more you can get understanding and comprehending of your own feelings and emotions, and then understand from someone first hand, you will be able to find a better understanding of the situation and comprehend your feelings even more after the fact.

What about the homeless person; is it that they are homeless? Or do you view them as being lazy? Do you think that all homeless people are drunk or drug addicts or have mental illness? Does the idea of homelessness frighten you? Does a homeless person scare you? Why? Do you feel that someone who is homeless has simply wasted their life away? What makes you feel or think this way?

And so on...

When you can identify what the core of the issues are, where YOU fit into the perceptions that you have; then you can start to turn it around.

It is very easy to judge. To hide that judgment behind simple "tolerance". Often, we judge to turn things away from ourselves and our true feelings about our selves.

Often, the very things we judge others for, are a direct reflection of something deep within ourselves that scare us. So we deflect, and we turn it outwards and find an object that we can target.

When we hide behind the idea of tolerance, and delve into a relationship or activity within the bonds of that which we are tolerating, we are hiding behind it even more. We make it "okay" to mask the truth because we are "working within" the bonds. But when we don't like something, but we do it anyway, what service is that truly doing for us?

In the end, everything turns back towards our Selves and who we are, what we are keeping buried, and why we are doing it.

A few years ago, my husband and I were approached by two very drunk, very large, very offending pee-smelling, homeless Native American (Indian) men. It was late at night and we were leaving a restaurant after dinner with friends, when these two men came upon us asking for money. I felt impressed to start talking with them, learning about them. My initial fears were soon replaced with compassion and understanding. 

I learned that the larger of the two, who was a severe diabetic, was a scared "man on the run" and was wanted on the reservation for murder. I did not ask details of the murder, but only that he was remorseful and as scared as he was, he only wished to go back home to his family, but fear prevented that. On top of that angst, was the knowledge that he was Chief of the clan since his father has passed, and his running away left a clan without a leader, completely abandoned.

Arriving in Phoenix, he had no money, no job or job skills, and he had started taking a liking to liquor and beer that dulled his memories and his pain. He began living on the streets, and soon his whole world was that of a street-sleeping, pan-handling drunk.

As the tears fell from this mans face, and the sobs racked through his body, and cries telling me that he only wanted to "go home", and the disease of alcoholism and terror holding him back, I felt nothing but love and compassion for him. I embraced him and held him close to me as he sobbed, the tears forming streaks down his dirty face and landing on my shirt. I did not care. In that moment, I was swept up in compassion and complete and total love for this man. His companion stood by watching and sobbing silently in his own grief of his life story, and the love and acceptance that was being shared. 

My husband and I went and bought them a good size meal, the younger and smaller of the two wanted a strawberry milk-shake, a rare treat surely. I told them that we would not give them any money, but we would give them a meal, something they had not had in days. The love and deep appreciation they offered in their humble "thanks" was enough. 

I did not care that my nice outfit was now stained with dirt, and that I smelled of strong smelling urine - these things can be washed, or bought new. All I cared about in that instance was letting these two men know that they are loved, regardless of their situation or their past, they were not judged but embraced and accepted. 

While I have no knowledge of what happened to them, I know that that night healed me in so many different ways. I felt an acceptance of these men that I never had before. I looked past the dirt, the smell, their foreboding sizes, the fear, and simply and completely accepted them and loved them.

As I stood in the shower that night, I cried. I cried for all the years that I had held my own judgment against others. Not knowing circumstances, or situations, or their "why"; I simply judged based on my own conception of what was right or what was wrong. But that night, as I stood in the shower, tears falling from my eyes intermingling with the fresh water from the shower head; I felt alive. I felt a love surging through my body I never had before. I released the past down the shower drain, and prepared for a new future of accepting and understanding if I ever felt I needed to "tolerate". And soon, that vulgar word, erased itself from my psyche and speech. 

In understanding the difference between tolerance and acceptance, we can truly free our Selves. Not just in the honesty of how we truly feel, but rather WHY we feel. Where did it come from. When we can find the seeds, we can identify our true Selves and our true nature. Once that is accomplished, we will see more acceptance; embracing, unconditional loving, and positive change.

_/|\_

Namaste 

©Leyla Hur

All Rights Reserved. Copying, altering, displaying or redistribution of this material without written permission from the author is strictly prohibited.

How the Pure The Love for a Child Can Connect Us

I have discovered today the complete and total unconditional love for a little girl. My niece has completely captured my heart. Is it normal to fall in love so totally in the first instant of seeing her on my Skype monitor?

Prior to today, I had only "known" her through the few photos I had been sent, and the few stories I had been told. I had not seen her in real time, moving, talking, experiencing any time "with her" as far away as I am. And I guess that put a barrier up between us, made her seem all the less "real" to me.

This afternoon, I spent almost two hours observing, talking, and falling in deeper love. Thanks to the beautiful invention of Skype, I was transferred into my mother's living room, and was able to talk to her, and have her see me, hear my voice, interact with me.

The first moment Mum moved her monitor and camera and my niece's face encroached upon my screen, tears of complete, unconditional love filled my eyes, and my heart grew several inches in my chest. The instantaneous adoration for this little girl enveloped my entire being.

WOW! I never knew such a connection before, in complete totality. There was a single moment of absolute cognition as my being whispered to me "She has some of my blood coursing through her. She is a part of me." and in that moment, I fell even further and deeper in love.

My niece is a year old. Only recently has my Mother figured Skype out, so I have not had the opportunity before this to "meet" her.

I have lived away from my family home for over eight years now, living on the opposite side of the Continent and in a different country. There have been times when I have grown homesick, but phone calls, emails, and an occasional visit has eased much of any homesickness. I have built a life that is different from my family's and as I have grown up and moved on, the truth of the matter is, we all get caught up in our own lives. We connect at times, touch base, say "I love you", but then we become consumed by our own lives once again.

In the eight and a half years since I moved away, there has only been two times when my heart ached to near breaking at not being home, being right there, experiencing and seeing first-hand. Those two times happened exactly (to the day) three months apart, in 2010.

The first was the day my niece was born. Circumstances were such were there was more than a possibility that I would not have seen her immediately anyway; but to be there with my family, my parents, my siblings, to celebrate, embrace and welcome this new life into our family.

The second was three months later when my Dad passed away suddenly. Once the initial shock and devastation lifted slightly, the only thing that consumed my mind was getting back home. Being with my Mum, sister, and brother. Sharing in the grief as a family under one roof.

Endless phone calls that lasted hours ensued during that first month. And in my mind the only thing I wanted was to be home. But as that first month turned into a second and then a third, I found that my mind began to ease on that feeling of wishing to be home.

Eventually, I will go home; probably not to stay, but for a visit. I realise that my life has moved on. I am a different person. I have grown in a direction that puts me on a different path. And that is OK.

However, moments like today, seeing my niece for the very first time, my arms now longing to hold her, my lips aching to kiss her; and it will happen. We have a life time ahead of us. Until then, we have the beauty of Skype to help us to interact. Today, she not only met me, but my dog and I saw her figure out how to grasp a crayon and draw something for the very first time.

And today, in that instant when I felt and saw the connection that she and I share, the same DNA and blood that courses through both of us; I recognized something deeper, bigger, higher. In a momentary blink, an instant that flashed before me, I became suddenly connected to all who went before me, my ancestors; and my nieces' ancestors - OUR ancestors. I saw the bigger picture for all of us. I recognized it and I embraced it.

In an momentary glimpse of the Universal Connection, I saw all of our DNA strands connecting, inter-mingling, and becoming one.

I saw the truth and absolute meaning in "Namaste" - I see you in me and me in you. Together, we are one.

What a beautiful gift my precious niece gave me today. And how in that alone, it makes me fall in love even deeper and greater; not just with her, but with every single person, we truly are all connected.

_/|\_

Namaste

©Leyla Hur

All Rights Reserved. Copying, altering, displaying or redistribution of this material without written permission from the author is strictly prohibited.

Lifting the Mask and Unearthing A Treasure

The past year has been a real roller coaster ride, with so many detours and changes along the ups and downs.

I have come full circle, and my 'circle' has expanded in the knowledge I have gained about myself.

For about a year, I have delved into a period of time of introspection. At the time my Dad passed, and for quite some time after that, I lost that introspection and just fell under a dark blanket of sorrow and deep grief. Consumed with the darkness, introspection disappeared from my existence as I coursed through the endless winding roads of sorrow and depression.

However, as the end to the darkness found a meeting with twilight, I once again found myself diving into the learning of Me, understanding and comprehending. Now I sit here, exposed bare to myself, understanding met with confusion, peace with chaos, joy with sorrow. And yes, that is exactly the roundabout that I am on right now.

We all wear masks. Once doors are closed to private and personal domains, no one knows what goes on in there. Our masks act in the same way, and so we choose to let certain people in for a glimpse of aspects of ourselves. Too often, we treat our Selves in the same manner, hiding away from the truth that is Us.

Delving in, thrusting open the curtains to let in the light and clear off the dust to the dirty window, and exposing oneself to Self, can be scary and confusing, sad and often lonely.

In my journey, I have found that I am surrounded by others who understand, who tell me that I am not alone in my journey, who love me in spite of my truth or maybe because of it. I am blessed to have those who do not judge closest to me.

Yes, I learned who I am. Coming out and revealing who I was to the chosen few closest to me, was more difficult than I could imagine. But they ease my burden, they are there for me to be open.

Sometimes, I am not as together as my mask would show. Often, behind my mask is a scared little girl who wants to hide away from the world.

Today I exclaimed in sheer panic "I don't WANT to be like this!", and I felt over come with shame and sorrow in the learning experience of my own truth. But it is a journey I am traversing, and as one very dear friend beautifully and loving me told me "things will start to make sense with each day that passes."

How many of us hide something deep down inside that we lock away so far, and under such high levels of security that we prevent ourselves security clearance? The more we try and hide from ourselves, the more out of balance our lives become. The process to rediscovering, embracing, and loving; regardless of what that deep buried truth is, is not an easy process. It means tearing up the foundations of what one assumes is a perfect and idyllic structure. But in the rebuilding process, the stress and frustration of the rebuild, or rather rediscovery, uncovers treasures that may never have been unearthed.

I am blessed. I am still walking my journey and dealing with emotions as they come. However, I am not looking forward, I am taking each step as it comes in a process. I embrace the positive and the negative as it arises, because each is an experience.

I pray the journey will be a short one, but I also know that when one journey ends, another begins. Sometimes, one merges in to another. Right now, I am just open to receiving and will embrace the time when I can impart my learning to others.

Namaste.

©Leyla Hur

All Rights Reserved. Copying, altering, displaying or redistribution of this material without written permission from the author is strictly prohibited.

Life's Curveball

Life changes in an instant.

I have had this experience too many times to recount.

I remember waking up one morning in 1999 to find my husband missing. Several days of worry and wonder at where he was "this time" came to an end when, three days later I woke up to news that he had killed himself.

In July 2010, I woke up one morning and went about my day, only to receive a phone call in the afternoon with news that my beloved father had died suddenly.

This morning, I woke up, began my day, had several things I was going to accomplish, and then learned news that my dearest friend had been in a severe accident.

The point I am trying to make is not what happened to these individuals, the point is how do we deal when we are faced with such situations. The point is examining ourselves up until the point of devastating news. The point is making a mark that matters each and every moment of our lives. The point is telling those you love "I love you" at every opportunity, and truly mean it from the bottom of your heart. The point is loving our Selves deeply, truly, and completely and being OK with our Selves no matter what is happening in our environment.

While I am still reeling from the news of this day, and I try to find my balance within the day, I can't help but think of the events leading up to the day.

While it is true that I am not living in someone else's brain and am not God to be omnipotent and know everything, I still ponder... that is a normal human emotional reaction to question.

As humans, we feel we need to know the answers to everything at every given moment, especially when we are affected. But to what end?

As humans we ask "why?" and "How could this be?" to that point that we often drive ourselves crazy, and sometimes driving ourselves into faithlessness, anger, and hatred. While these are "normal" human reactions to situations, we must also know when to let go and let it just be.

This is one of the hardest things to do. To not allow our minds to drive us to places of craziness in over-thinking, over-analysing, and over-doing. Sometimes, things are just as they are; there is always a reason, but maybe that reason is not ours to know (just yet). Maybe it is not ours to know ever.

Re-playing situations and events out in our minds over and over again, does not change the outcome. Learning from a situation can better help us understand ourselves and our reaction to the event. Will it make a difference for further events should they arise, it can and sometimes it doesn't as human emotion can sometimes outweigh and overcome rational thought.

Getting locked and lost in a moment of time, without it being able to change the outcome, just holds us back from the reason for being in the exact place and time we were when the event or situation happened.

Nothing happens to us without reason. It might not be our reason, and to understand this, one has to go outside of themselves to accept that there may possibly be a greater energy force at play.

After my first husband killed himself, I became homeless within 2 1/2 days. For a long time, I got lost in the "whys" and "how comes" and "what could I do differently's". The fact remained that nothing I could have done would have saved his life if HE did not want it to be saved. At the time, there was nothing I could do to change the situation to which I became homeless.

What I learned from that experience was that life sends us curve-balls, sometimes on a more continual basis. Maybe the curve-balls are sent to show us how strong we are to overcome. Maybe they are sent to change us from one situation to another (one path to another) that is more suited to us. Most often, the curve-balls are not easy to bear. They are not fun. They are uncomfortable, but that is why they are called "curve-balls". How we deal with them is the key to our learning and our growth.

Each of us has potential for growth. If we did not, we would not still be in this life, walking the path of a human being. But sadly, too many of us get locked in to place. We get locked in to the situation and life we are in, because change is scary, uncomfortable, and at times too difficult to grapple with.

Too many of us get stuck. We may not like the situations we are in, but we are more comfortable staying the course of the known, than traversing the path of the unknown and potentially experiencing something amazing.

There is a saying about the grass being greener on the other side of the fence. Sometimes it is. But if we are not willing to explore, and take a chance, take a risk, we will never know. We will only dream of the rumours that occur.

Sometimes, we take that leap of faith and find ourselves standing in a briar patch. That is OK too because often it is not the destination, but the journey to the destination that is where the learning and the experience comes.

Once our minds are expanded, they can never constrict back to where they once were.

The more we ask "why" from an outside source, and the less we ask "why" within ourselves and then traverse a path of learning to understand what OUR "why" is, the more we will continue to be locked in the groove we have created for ourselves.

When things happen "to us", we can shut ourselves down and shut everyone out, and get lost within the constant loop of replaying what happened; or we can jump off the wheel that is spinning furiously around us, and create a positive change in our life.

Death is never an answer to that change. It leaves behind a trail of unendings, pain, more questions, and cyclular events. It traps others into a web of attitude and devastation.

When death occurs in the natural frame work of time, it is more easily understood and more readily answered. But the taking of ones life, the thought of taking ones life, is not an answer.

Death does not end our current situation, but rather it perpetuates it on a grander scale. This experience of life is for learning, for gathering information, and for experiencing everything - including some of the most difficult and painful moments. To take away that life sends us into a tailspin of having to address the issues in a different place, a different time, but nevertheless still having to address them.

Death is easy. The contemplation of dying is the hardest part. The actual death process is easy. I know, I have done it time and time again.

I too have contemplated, gotten lost in the depths of misery, and attempted to take my own life on more than a few occasions. Once the mind is made up, everything else is easy.

But it is not worth it. The consequences, the climbing back, is all the more difficult than starting to create a change in environment, attitude, and visualization right where one is standing now.

I understand this issue from both sides of the fence, having done it and having it done "to" me. And I have learned some of my greatest lessons from it.

When that black cloud of despair, depression, and pain lifts, and the light begins to infiltrate again, perspectives change.

If that black, suffocating, pain-filled cloud is settling around you right now; burst through your own emotions, find that determination within yourself and seek a positive and creative change. Do not get lost in it, do not get trapped in it. There is a greater answer, a more positive solution and that curve-ball CAN be caught, and then ran with.

Know that you are NEVER alone. You are of infinite worth. You are a precious commodity here upon this earth to share of your Self, your Light, your Love, and your wisdom and knowledge with others. Each one of us has just cause to be here at this very moment in time and at this very place. There is only one way to go from here, and that it up the path of learning, success, and to do it with love.

YOU are loved beyond your greatest imaginings and you are NEEDED beyond that which you can comprehend, and so often by those who do not voice it. Hold to that truth and that knowledge and keep walking the path, it WILL get easier in time, I promise you this.

I celebrate YOU in ALL your glory, your beauty, your wisdom, your Being-ness. Please take a moment to look in the mirror and celebrate and love YOU as I see you and love you.

Celebrating your magnificence!


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United States National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255
Australia Lifeline: 131114
Samaritans UK: 08457 90 90 90
Samaritans ROI: 1850 60 90 90
Samaritans Hong Kong: 23822007

INTERNATIONAL World-Wide Suicide & Crisis Hotlines:
http://suicidehotlines.com/international.html

©Leyla Hur

All Rights Reserved. Copying, altering, displaying or redistribution of this material without written permission from the author is strictly prohibited.

Springtime Ecstasy

Today is a glorious Sunday in the Valley of the Sun.

After yesterday's rain, hail, and cold temperatures it has freshened things up. The wind is blowing a little more than lightly and it sings its song through the leaves of the trees, and dances off the wind chimes whose soft voice intermingles with the sweet song of the birds chirping away.

The breeze is cool, the skies, a brilliant azure with a puff of white cloud here and there. It is a sky that one can get lost in as it draws you in to its beauty and depth. Stories of the ages whispered into your being as you raise further and further into the magic of the vortex.

I dream of laying out on the lush green grass in the garden, its softness awakening my senses as I feel the little bristles of individual blades of grass gently poking my bare skin. The wind rushes over me while the sun touches my skin in the places the cool breeze has brushed, lending it warmth to the game. It is an erotic dance of the senses, hot and cold licking and teasing my body. Mother Nature in her finest and Spring-time truly bursting forth in a dance of fertility, love, and passion. This dance raises in fervor until the shudder of chills and ecstasy bursts in pure energy orgasm, delighting the senses intermingling with the theme of the season,  amplifying the intensity in the beauty of this day.  

Spring-time moments of beauty, passion, and enjoyment are what entice me on this beautiful Sunday.

Taking a mere moment in reflection of the nature that is around us, the passion in the season, the beauty of the moment, and the enjoyment that is life.

©Leyla Hur

All Rights Reserved. Copying, altering, displaying or redistribution of this material without written permission from the author is strictly prohibited.